the next 20 days

What a week it has been¬† ūüôā¬† ¬† Thank you so much to everyone who watched our video on Give1Save1caribbean¬†this week.¬†¬†I feel like our story is a bit different¬†and I¬†pray that it brought awareness to the¬†¬†orphan crisis and maybe spoke to another couple who has been thinking about adopting but fears they are too old. ¬†The donations received will help pay for¬†one of our¬†trips to Haiti to visit our son in the orphanage before we are able to bring him home.¬† If you donated, THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts.

We will be leaving for Haiti in 20 days to meet our son, Bo (age 2 1/2), for the first time.¬† I get so many conflicting emotions going on inside when I think about what this experience will be like….excited, happy, joy…I can’t wait to hug him.¬† I can’t wait to look deep into his eyes and somehow convey to him that I am his mommy and I will fight to bring him home to us as fast as I can.¬† I want to sit with him, play with him, eat with him,¬†nap with him.¬†¬†BUT,¬†I also have these fears constantly¬†sneaking into my mind:¬† What if he doesn’t like us?¬†¬†What if he is scared of us?¬† What if¬†he looks¬†at us and thinks¬†“why are everyone else’s new parents young, but my new parents¬†are old?”

Since March I have been living¬†each day listening to and trusting God at¬†every step of this very long adoption process.¬† God has taught me so much along the way (like, I found out how much God actually talks to you if you are listening ūüôā¬† Over the next 20 days this is what I’m going to focus on:

*I¬†will be listening to God¬†each day…all the way to Haiti.

*I will¬†try so hard not to listen to the “voices in my head” telling me I’m too old.

*I will look forward to the totally unique way that God will bring us together with one of His precious children.

*I will continue to be humbled by God choosing me to be this little boy’s mommy (I still can’t believe He would choose me )

*I will pray that, to my very special little boy, I look like the mommy he has longed for.

If you have already had this experience of meeting your adopted child for the first time, please share your experience..the good, the bad, and the ugly ūüôā